Last week we were out at a bar watching the playoffs. My Daughter and some friends came into town and met us for a beer. The kids left and went to another bar and eventually met up with us later that night.
They told me that they had asked around about my Crack Head Barber. I tend to think that most people
do not believe that he is truly a crack head and think I am simply writing an amusing story.
I see this guy every 3 or 4 weeks and I can tell that there is something amiss. He is gray, gaunt and shakes. (not so much shaking that he cannot cut hair but vascular surgery is definitely out)
Anyway, the kids confirm my tale and also that he is in deep trouble with the local crack dealers. It is rumored that he is in the hole for $8,000 and the dealers are “looking for him“.
A few observations and comments:
- Why would you keep selling a person crack and let them run up an 8K bill? If he were an NBA or
rock star then it’s ok but a barber in a town of 5000 people? I would say he’s a bad risk.
- If they are looking for him then why not try the BARBER SHOP!!! I would bet if they check the
shop out on M-F, say around 8:00 - 5:00 PM, they may luck out and spot him.
- What kind of dealers are these people? They let this guy run up a huge tab and everyone knows it.
The shop is 1/2 a block down from the police station and right on main street. It’s not like the
Soprano’s where they can move in and “Take Over”.
I was thinking about stepping in and seeing if I can manage his debt. The crack dealers may accept a payment plan and it looks like they also need some management. The dealers are from a town called
WILD ROSE and I would think they may not be the type of dealers to strike fear into your heart. Think
about telling people you come from Wild Rose Vs Chicago! Anyway I do not want them to hurt the guy
so much that he cannot cut hair. Maybe I can get my friend Pedro to “offer his protection“.
I have been out of town a lot since the great victory by GW and have neglected to keep up with my site. But since none of you actually paid my subscription fee you can’t whine. I am kind of sorry that
the election is over because Teresa and John were such easy targets. Their supporters just never had a
clue.
Anyway, I returned home late Friday night and was winding down from a long drive by reading the local paper. In the crime section was a report concerning my barber. The headline read:
“BARBER CHARGED WITH FORGERY“.
In the story it is reported that the Barber had received a check from a customer made out for $10. Later that night the Barber was drinking at a local Pub and he altered the check to $100. He then had the bartender cash it. I assume the Barber kept drinking the night away on the ill-gotten gains.
The crime came to light when the victim reported the check alteration. Our illustrious police force soon cracked the case and the Barber was arrested. The scene of the crime is a dive bar about 1/2 a block from the barber shop.
In a statement the Barber said he did not recall the night in question and that he was:
“probably very drunk that night”.
NOTE: In my town $100 can get you pretty wasted. Beers are 2 or 3 bucks and mixed drinks are
also reasonable.
I am planning a hair cut on Monday and will issues a further report. As a protective measure I will pay cash. Hopefully this will not hider my Barber business and he will continue to provide his fine service. Another interesting side note is that the crime was discovered when the $100 check bounced. If I decided to get into the forgery business I would try to set my goals a litter higher and pick my victims with more care.