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                                            Keep the Spotted Owls Out of Wisconsin

                                                                 By:  Sheila

      What is a spotted owl and why in the world should we care?  The answer to the first question is simple.  A spotted owl, also known as a dark brown owl, is found in the dense, old-growth forests of British Columbia, central Mexico, and the Pacific Northwest.  They have spotted chests (what a shock), primarily feed on rodents (good to know, set your traps), and the females tend to be larger than the males (are you saying she's fat?).  Question 2...Why should we care?  My answer, point blank, is that we shouldn't.  Let me tell you why~

      In Sweet Home, Oregon, the spotted owl has caused quite a debate.  The owls were put on the endangered species list (worthless piece of paper), which sparked the issue at hand.  The Endangered Species Act of 1973 prohibited "significant habitat modification or degradation."  As a result of this lovely little "Act", they closed federal and state timber lands to logging. Since the "birds" basically live in old-growth forests, as mentioned earlier, many people went to put a stop to logging!

      The timber industry is an extremely important economic source for the community's families.  Anyone who could stand up straight and write there own name worked at one of them.  But due to an abundance of whiny conservationists saying, "save the owls" and "stop logging now", 5 mills had to close, and about 410 workers got laid off.  Imagine not being able to feed your children because of a pair of owls?  Explain THAT one to the wife.

FYI:  The Willamette National Forest produced and sold more logs than any other national forest.  There was PLENTY of work, and plenty of mouths being fed.  But then in 1992, due primarily to these pesky birds, they only produced 100,000 board feet, a pathetically dramatic decrease from previous years.  Thus the problem.  Men came home with pink slips, and many were not trained or skilled for any other line of work.  They lost their homes, their pride, and some, their families.  I bet a lot of them bought owl traps though. 

      As I think about this issue, I wonder where people's minds are.  Are owls more important than people?  I'm thinking no.  I feel that compassion should be first placed on people, not animals.  Also, with the invention of cloning, we should not have to worry about the endangered species list anymore.  By now we can pop them out like popcorn.  Give me a break.

      I think that the people of Sweet Home and the surrounding areas should take a stand against the spotted owl.  To rid themselves of this "thing" that has given them so many problems.  I suggest starting a "spotted owl skeet shoot" to recover lost wages.  I'm sure there are plenty of yuppies out there willing to pay for it. I think it would be a wise investment on their part.  I can see it now.... ~Spotted Owl Skeet Shoot Champion 2005~ What a title to own!
ENVIRONMENTALIST SQUISHES OWL
BLAMES LOGGERS
PUBLIC OUTRAGED
Please don't hurt me!
"Whats up with that?
Hey! Stop him!
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